shortform

mapgame 2

this is a map but i took away the title and legend. your goal is to guess what the map represents. (this one is very very hard without hints)

note 530

the solar plexus wins my award for body part that sounds most like a wrestling move

LEAKED 2035 IMO questions

Word has spread that a genius yet evil mathematician has leaked the problems that will be contained in the 2035 International Math Olympiad. This mathematician is reportedly a diehard fan of Gottfried Leibniz and will stop at nothing to sabotage math competitions which don’t include calculus. (They also claim to have burned over four hundred copies of Voltaire’s Candide.) Seeing as I once got a 120 on the AMC 10 but was not once selected for my country’s IMO team, I have decided to join the evil mathematician in their quest and publish all of the leaked questions.

Day 1

Question 1

What is 3471239847981237489021374897 times 7807123894710928375490128508734657801634?

Question 2

Suppose there exists a blue guy $P$ at the center of circle $Q$ (the “blue world”) with radius 7. Suppose also that $Q$ has two parallel chords $\overline{AB}$ and $\overline{CD}$. The region $R$ is a blue tree defined by $\overline{AB}$, $\overline{CD}$, and $Q$. If triangle $ACP$ is isosceles with $AP = PC = 8$, what is the area of the blue tree?

Question 3

Prove that every even number greater than 2 is the sum of two primes.

Day 2

Question 4

An island contains 100 goblins, labeled $g_1, g_2, \ldots, g_{100}$. Each goblin has either a red or a blue hat. The island also contains two gates, one red and one blue. Each day at noon, the red gate opens with probability $2/5$ and the blue gate opens with probability $7/10$. The goblins are not allowed to speak or hear or look at anything, except that they are allowed to look at the hats of exactly two other goblins of their choice. Each goblin has 100 days to go through a gate, but if they go through the gate that matches their color of hat they will be killed.

Question 5

Ok now get this one: Is $x$ bigger than $y$?

Question 6

How many numbers are there

note 529

i couldn’t help but notice your various imperfections

note 528

fact of the matter is, if you are hanging out and someone tosses a ball or a pillow to someone else, that object will get tossed around for another 3 to 10 more minutes.

note 527

the garlic community has been shocked by what some are calling “the clove of the century”

note 526

does anyone have some spare essence of bug. i need to make a potion

note 525

life got this bitch reading Man’s Search for Meaning by Viktor E. Frankl

note 523

not impressed when someone tells me their ribs fall off the bone. like ok yours dont know how to balance. whatever

note 524

Q: What kind of yogurt do gorillas eat?

colors of noise

“white noise pink noise brown noise” you may have heard of these. well i’ve listened to all of them for about 30 seconds apiece and here are my ratings. the official source for each color is whatever came up first in youtube search.

• white: 2/10. awful but you’ve gotta respect it
• pink: 3/10. bleh
• brown: 7/10. it’s pretty nice
• blue: 5/10. like brown noise but worse
• black: 8/10. ah, the void
• yellow: 7/10. mysterious and brooding.
• red: 8/10. also pretty nice
• magenta: 3/10. “the pink noise alternative” yup and same score
• orange: 6/10. subtle but i respect it
• gray: 3/10. annoying but not too bad
• green: 6/10. this is what’s inside your brain when you’re tired
• transparent: 6/10. whatever
• indigo: 2/10. largely sucks
• cyan: 6/10. whatever

this is not on the same scale as the ones detailed in that one blog post. unlike music i wouldn’t listen to any of these for fun.

note 522

“her bark is worse than her bite,” she said.

then the dog shot me with a gun.

mapgame 1

this is a map but i took away the title and legend. your goal is to guess what the map represents. (this one is very very hard without hints)

note 521

somebody better call all the king’s horses and all the king’s men. cause im cracked

note 520

just another sanic sunday

note 519

i need a blinker on the roof of my car for when i ascend to heaven

note 518

crossing the road should be illegal. learn to appreciate the side you’re on.

note 517

in 2025 when you google me, every single image will be me smiling awkwardly at some red carpet photoshoot

note 516

going to stop taking life advice from people who aren’t happier than me

note 515

well, i’m trapped in a psychic prison for the next 2000 years. but at least i’m not danny. that guy’s trapped for 3000 years