the bronk
note 333
i’m going to send you to hell, and then destroy hell
note 332
they both say, ‘Land, ho!’
thank you for your patience
evilsmiley
note 331
what do a pirate and a rude air traffic controller have in common?
punchline coming tomorrow
note 330
android fuck off. jonkerOS runs on three TRILLION devices
note 329
loving these new Pokemon they added https://t.co/MeimJrHII8
note 328
when is congress gonna start writing some laws against Evil
note 327
new on the history channel: Andrew Johnson: Was He The Father Of Lyndon B. Johnson?
note 326
smoking, drinking and vaping right now. just to get it out of the way
bigfoot
note 325
turning 21 soon, can’t wait to find out what this whole “alcohol” thing is about
note 324
state lotteries are like a reverse welfare program
note 323
i like how weather websites try to do clickbait, but to stay on-brand they make it all weather-related clickbait
note 322
photorealistic martin egg https://t.co/56X1r3dzS0
note 321
if you’re wondering why i haven’t tweeted in a while, it’s because there’s no more jokes. i’ve said everything funny already
hands up in the air
martin egg (hyperrealistic)
note 320
when legislation goes to the supreme court it has to pass a constitution check
note 319
twitter is a good website, but i think it would be better if they made the character limit 281 instead