notes

note 20

i’ve been noticing lately how many things look like inkblots

note 19

dianetics. a true cult classic

note 18

yolo! that’s spanish for yol

note 17

chair book table is the most english sounding name ever

note 16

the bartender says, “why the long face?”

a tachyon wearing a horse mask walks into a bar

note 15

now imagine you’re fucking a sheep

you fucking like that don’t you

note 14

now the real question is, do fingers look like carrots or do carrots look like fingers

note 13

cool math fact: if the digits of a number add up to 1, the number is a power of 10

note 12

everyone riding dragons in movies but why do they stop worrying about falling after the first 3 seconds

note 11

sugar cookies? as opposed to what

note 10

be careful who you call ugly in reindeer school

note 9

on ugly sweater day, tape a piece of paper to ur shirt that says “ur face”

note 8

in the beginning, there were two words: intro and duce. we added them together and called it introduce. this was revolutionary at the time.

note 7

i go to roly polytechnic

note 6

what is with those little metal rectangles on the bottoms of doors

note 5

been keeping tabs on my bread

note 4

LPT: eat 2000 spiders every year on january 1st to get it over with

note 2

let’s play whack-a-mole i’ll be the mole and ur butt will be the mallet

note 3

some water flows, some water the flowers

note 1

secret to success on math tests: put the right numbers in the right places