notes

note 576

can’t believe eve gave up the garden of eden for an apple. if it was me they would’ve needed something way tastier, like maybe a pizza

note 575

i appreciate Grand Totals, i think they are the only totals really befitting my stature

note 573

do NOT interact if you work for the Dark Lord

note 574

america needs to construct more blue science packs if we ever want to keep up with china

note 572

dude, did you just offer me a Corona? like, the beer whose name is part of the word coronavirus? no way, dude. keep your disease beer to yourself

note 570

if you’re not with me you’re against me. and if you don’t love me you hate me. you HATE me!!!!!!!!

note 571

didn’t you know, officer? it’s national speeding day

note 567

we don’t need pop culture. we can get rid of it at this point

note 568

the cement is rapidly solidifying around me. but that’s neither here nor there

note 569

i think it would be a fun plot point if a few MLB players missed games because of jury duty each season

note 566

would you like to join my malign list

note 565

robbing peter to pay the pickled pepper

note 564

you have NO intangibles, NO x-factor, and not even a LICK of je ne sais quoi!!!

note 562

i once tried being green. it was trivial for me

note 563

well if it’s not important, then why do i think about it so much? checkmate

note 561

me and my boys just posted up in the most nutrient dense part of the substrate

note 559

P.T. Barnum [suddenly getting sentimental]: a sucker dies every minute

note 560

why would i check my spam folder for your message. did you send me spam?

note 557

my hindsight is 20/80. what the hell happened, man

note 558

being a cheerleader sounds like fun. smiling, dancing, waving around pom poms. what’s not to like